God! I curse these gadgets. They are making my life more complicated.

Do you know what that means? I don’t and I have done mental acrobatics to come up with a logical definition for that term.

It’s a sign that still hangs in some intersection in Guadalupe, the area that I used as my mental landmark to get off from EDSA to Ayala. I could think of possible explanations and the list is inexhaustible:

1. the vehicles stop moving when they get to this point thereby, giving all passengers a relative sense of calm
2. commuters asphyxiate because of the excessive carbon dioxide in the air — it’s like inhaling weed, it gives you a sense of profound calmness
3. because of the congestion the fuming drivers are forced to calm their nerves
4. the various wares displayed on the makeshift stalls overwhelm all senses and take you to an altered-state of consciousness
5. traffic is synonymous to movement of vehicles… it’s only in the PH that the term is used to mean unmoving vehicles

I love Makati! That’s my new mantra.

And I mean it literally. I can see myself on my deathbed with a box of Lindt 70% pure chocolate and a glass of red. I hope I don’t have to be fed via tubes and I hope I can still hold a glass and raise it to my lips.

Why the morbid thought? I don’t know. I have been very scared over the prospect of dying without preamble… I want to be able to orchestrate my last days. Just shows my need to control.

Well, such is the life of a working person… specifically, a career, goal-oriented person. I know that it is nothing new, not even worth an entry into the blogosphere but here I am anyway, harping about my work and the roaches that inhabit the many cubes in this building.

The skype conference call was a joke. I can barely make out what the other person is saying. Hahaha! I hear them actually because they are a few cubes away from me.

I should have been at home right now, enjoying a peaceful evening with my children. I am sure Birdy and Una are fighting over BigBird and Dora right now. I can see them arguing over which disc to feed the player first and who gets to sit on the new plastic chair.

I remembered telling Joan how having kids prepare you for the corporate world whose inhabitants are mostly overgrown children. It should be easy really but then I get surprised still at how a well-dressed, fully-made woman can act so f****ng out of reason. Power play and politics.

Yeah, I should be armed myself. Hey, give me back my Sun Tzu. And no, am sick of anything that has to do with Italians right now. Enough!

Something terrible happened to me last Sunday and just the thought of it fills Hell to brim with hatred that I have to ban it from my memory… so help me God. Let’s not talk about it here. But just so you know, I’ve learned the lesson and am now wearing an imitation watch and purse.

How did the kids react the first time they saw you? Ecstatic would be an understatement. Having them cling to me again like leaches is like being in a tangled brand of heaven.

Both babies are amazed with the shower. Hahaha! Mandaue was suffering from insufficient water supply and although we spend huge bills on our water and had to buy them by the bucket on arid days, we never had the luxury of a shower. It must be like rain-on-demand for them… and they are pretty creative in their excuses to shower.

The inflatable bed that I was sleeping on during the empty apartment period, I now relegate to the babies and they think it’s a trampoline. I am sure the neighbors will be leaving soon with all the rackets that the two imps make every day.

Una is in the industry vs inferiority stage and would volunteer to cook, clean and wash. It’s a joy to watch the little hand get busy and at one point, I allowed her to launder the dish towel in the sink and after 30 minutes of squishing and soaping I saw her wiping her brother’s face with the same towel… and the poor Santino submitted his self without protest.

I got to work safe this morning… with Jude. At 10, my ey es refused to open and I felt cold all over so I treated myself to a nice cup of Cafe Mocha and some Bosa Nova in the neighboring buidling. Am feeling great now.